Elementary, My Dear Solver 
Half of 10? ZERO [not half of
ten]
Union acquisition? INLAW
Theme: Hidden chemical elements in phrases
Unexpected twist {and theme}
SURPRISEELEMENT 
Numbers after nine, often ONEONE [they’re integers if they make up the number 11 --- and if so, why is
nine given and not, say,
ten or
two?]
Juiced BLOTTO [first you get juiced then you get blotto --- juiced is "high"; blotto is "out of it"]
ESOS [unless you go with "On-line help?"]
RATING:
Three grins = Loved it; Two grins = Enjoyed it; One grin = A bit bland for my taste; One teardrop = No fun
